Success doesn’t give you permission to be a dickhead

Success doesn't mean you get to be a dickhead.

“Never meet your heroes lest they disappoint you.”

I mean, who hasn’t met someone they’ve admired only to be crushed when they turned out to be a complete bell-end?

You might think this post will be about a successful dickhead I met – but it’s quite the opposite.

How do you see yourself?

When I attended Content Marketing World run by the Content Marketing Institute (CMI) I met Joe Pullizi, the founder.  Now, this is a multi-million-dollar organisation with more than 100,000 subscribers and social media followers. They create and share fantastic blogs, white papers, videos, presentation slides and more. They produce a magazine and offer consulting services. They are thought leaders in their industry and Joe Pullizi is the founder and face of it all.

At the conference, I had the pleasure of chatting to Joe on several occasions. He was utterly charming (with everyone), not to mention generous with his knowledge and CMI resources, offering to send me some details about one of the CMI revenue models.

In fact, the whole CMI team and the conference speakers were amazingly friendly and approachable. To be honest with you, it was quite disarming and very humbling.

Why? I saw this group of very successful people talk about themselves as a small business. They clearly weren’t. Well, not to me. But they had the mindset of being a small business that saw every single follower and customer as a person of value. Not an LV (lifetime value) figure.

How they engaged with all the people at the conference reflects how they engage with everyone.

Awesomeness vs dickheads

I’ve had the pleasure of meeting people who are quite a big deal in the business and blogging world. Thanks to their friendly open nature and great conversation skills, I’ve actually been none the wiser about how big they really were. They listened to me like I was the most interesting person in the room and asked me lots of questions – about myself.

I walked away feeling like I was important.

In direct contrast, I’ve met and worked with people who clearly think they are pretty hot shit. They were successful and they knew it. As I talked to them I felt like I was being scanned for potential and it made me feel a bit grubby.

I walked away feeling like I wasn’t good enough – feelings that were quickly dismissed but they surfaced for a fraction of a second.

It’s never okay to be a dickhead

Just because you reach your goals… Just because you’ve published a book… Just because people start to know who you are on Twitter… Success does not give you permission to be a dickhead. Ever.

Being kind, considerate, generous and genuinely interested in every person you meet might not earn you more dollars in the short term. It will earn you a reputation for being awesome and it will make you a good human. If you need an ROI, you’ll gain loyal followers who care about your message and actively share it through their own network.

You don’t know everyone in the whole world and you never know who you are talking to right now. They might simply be a nice person to talk to. They might be the next Richard Branson.

So remember. No matter how well-known you become, don’t be a dickhead. Try not to let yourself become too big for those boots of yours. You’ll feel more relaxed about yourself and people will love you for it.

This rant is brought to you by… Belinda

14 Responses

    1. I think you’ve really hit the nail on the head there Sarah. When you act with sincerity and integrity, people will be drawn to you. When you don’t, you’ll never reach the success you otherwise might.

      How to keep your feet on the ground is another thing and those boots at the right size is another matter. Even the nicest person can get carried away.

      Thanks for commenting!

  1. Gosh I SO agree with this post. It’s become very very scary in our own industry the number of people who publish an ebook and all of a sudden they’re the bee’s knees and they let you know it! I’ve been in practice for over 13 years and I still reckon I’m learning. Biggest turn off for me is someone who thinks they’re all that. I don’t want to do business with them and I sure don’t want to be like them! I definitely wouldn’t refer them. Thanks for this post.

    1. Thank you for commenting!

      Constant self-promotion and self-interest changes how you treat other people and it’s a very short term strategy. It’s become a cliche to give generously but it really does bring rewards in the long term.

  2. Belinda, What a wonderful post — thank you! I have the pleasure of working with Joe, and I always tell people, he sincerely is one of the nicest people I know. It was so nice to be in Sydney and get the chance to meet you.

    1. haha thanks Joe and of course not! Everyone at the conference had an open mind and a generous spirit. It was a great vibe to be around and it set the bar nice and high!

      I just don’t have the time or energy to spend on people who openly assess me for my value. Life is too short!

  3. I went to an Adelaide meet up with some Amazing b-school babes this week. We were talking about the problogger event, and those who have attended commented how humble so many of the total ROCK STAR bloggers are. That is so cool! Seriously the coolest.

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